Thu, 22 Apr 1993 19:10:36 -0400 (EDT)

Based on jihad lingual interpretations of the seventh scroll found at Al-Bek-Maharait turns out the latest derivation of sub cranial mis-pops is epicenteredat Tool's Lounge, a neighborhood greasy spoon in the Hill district, Pittsburgh,PA. It seems that measured autotoms hit 7.3 on the Daniel Purt scale ofmeasurable brain miscalcula. The U.S. satellite MONEGRA (Measured Optonesof Neutral Equilibrium Growing Rapidly Acetically) picked up sine-wave postkunst catharta at a rate less than normally measured by its solar poweredgravitational surfer.It is believed in Cape Canarveral Florida that Pittsburghmay soon be the location of a mercurial aura, or stellar glow. A new labelplaced on the Durthis Map, (or Huggins Measure) denotes a negative pimple,or Pharangial Pit with it's neurocenter just two blocks, or seven Utmes,from Tool's Lounge. It is concluded at the Marshall Feck Space HypotheticalBantam Lab that the only hope for reconditioning of Pittsburgh bad auramight just be the formation of a basketball team!

Dr. M